Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
