I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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