The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Your cock deserves a montage
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
There's even glitter on my cock...
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