Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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