I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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