It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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