now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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