i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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