While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
They have beer where we have blood.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
