dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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