I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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