...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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