next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
