Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
