I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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