I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
