we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize