We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
