explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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