no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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