I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Randomize
