Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize