Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Just pee around me
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
