just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
