i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
