Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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