am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
