I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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