White coat. Heels.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
