i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
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