I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
