when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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