as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I'm both gender and math confused
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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