I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
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