i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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