She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
