Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Found your dick twin last night
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I think weed is turning my hair brown
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
