I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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