My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
