It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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