How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
