Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
