No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Randomize
