i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
You dont lie about slip and slides
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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