Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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