So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
