I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
