How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
