So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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