I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Drunk is not a location!
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
